SCOOP 2012: Dear Shaun Deeb
Dear Shaun Deeb,
Today was Mother's Day where I live. I called my mother and told her I loved her. I made breakfast--eggs florentine--for my wife. I took my entire family 90 miles south to a zoo. I fed a giraffe. A giraffe, Shaun. It ate greens from my trembling fingers. I watched two giant tortoises writhe--slowly--in a disgusting springtime dance of love. It was quite a day, one that should be ending with the kind of glow a man who has seen two big turtles mating should have.
You know what I'm doing instead? You know what I've been doing pretty much all day? I've been thinking about you, Shaun.
Now, I'll be honest. I've been a bit preoccupied with the Spring Championship of Online Poker recently. It's not only my job, but it's a bit of a passion. Every spring for the past several years, I've dedicated a couple weeks of my life to making sure this blog offers the best SCOOP coverage available. In my mind, the biggest news of the day was supposed to be that SCOOP had already racked up $32,599,494 in prize money today. That's big news, Shaun. That's really, really big news.
But, no. I'm thinking about you. Right now, two of the top two stories at the top of this blog have your face (and your grandmother's) on them. I'm thinking about you running roughshod all over SCOOP like you owned it. And you know what? The only thing my kid wants to watch right now? Shaun the Sheep. Shaun the freaking Sheep. I can't make this up.
Right now, I should be thinking about a cup of tea, or maybe a Moscow Mule nightcap, but instead, I'm looking at your smiling face and wondering, "Is he doing this just to keep me up at night?"
As of early this morning, you had three SCOOP watches. You won two of those titles in the last week. I'd already interviewed you once and wrote a nice little piece about how you were starting to make Viktor Blom look like he wasn't trying.
Now, after the giraffe and the tortoise love, I get a look at the updated SCOOP Player of the Series rankings and see you are brutalizing the overall leaderboard. I mean, I know everyone else is putting in some solid hours and effort, but you're making it look like they aren't showing up. Honestly, Shaun, I don't want to step out of line, but you might just be showing off a little bit now. I know we aren't close, but maybe you should just dial it back a bit, hit the beach, have a cocktail, look up some tortoise videos on You Tube. This is getting a bit unseemly.
Here's the thing: my kid plays little league ball. He's a young'un. It's not a serious pursuit. So, when his team is winning by 12 runs with an inning left to play, the coach sort of dials it back, holds the kids at first base when they could have a triple, and plays his kids out of position. In other words, he knows his team is going to win, but he...say it with me...gives the other team a chance to have fun.
I can't tell you what to do, Shaun. You're a 26-year-old man. You will make your own decisions. But, I'm here to ask you, as a son, a father, a husband, as a man who wants to sleep and not dream about you: give it a rest.
The PokerStars Blog guy, Brad
PS--Or, in lieu of all that, just go ahead and let me know if you're going to win all three main events, okay?