The exuberance of Joel Micka’s rail cannot be overstated. There are not enough adjectives to properly describe the raucous, joyful, elated, cacophonous rumble that comes from the rail of the 2013 PCA main event. As a man who trades in words, I feel at a loss to properly impart just how loud and boisterous it is. This is the best I can do.
Among those people who just watched their man Micka gets heads up for the PCA title is Joseph Lind, a player himself who goes by the name BigPapaLind. Now, as you might expect from the name, Lind is no small guy (he’s the one in purple in the photo below). But the man can jump. He can jump like no BigPapa I’ve ever known. He’s got what the kids used to call “ups.” The 26-foot ceilings of the Imperial Ballroom seem to be his only barrier.
I know this, because I’ve seen Lind’s underpants.
Just before the dinner break–and just moments after Micka knocked Jerry Wong out of the tournament–Micka’s rail found itself in an uncontrolled frenzy, like what would happen if you mixed amphetamines with cooking grease and lit it all on fire.
This is when I saw Lind’s drawers.
As the chips got rearranged, I went in search of a cup of coffee to help me keep up with the kids. I’d made it about ten yards into the hallway when BigPapa ran by me. Words were falling out of his mouth so fast that no one could understand him. I heard him scream “heads-up for it all!” like it was a warrior’s battle cry. And then Lind jumped.
He jumped right out of his shorts.
I’m not kidding.
I didn’t think it was possible. I didn’t think Lind could jump that high, that fast, with that much power. But he did, and his basketball shorts simply couldn’t keep up. It reminded me of a magician sweeping a tablecloth out from under a table full of dishes, except, of course, it was a twenty-something man in his underwear.
Now Lind’s shorts are back up and Micka is heads-up for the title. As it should be.
Brad Willis is the PokerStars Head of Blogging