Saturday, 4th February 2023 08:44
Home / Events / Missing in Spain: PokerStars Blogger

Here at the PokerStars Blog, we do not breed our bloggers. We know there are so many out there who need homes, and it would be cruel to leave them out on the street when we have the space and heart to care for them here. We believe in the blogger rescue effort, and with one notable exception, we are a no-kill shelter (and re: the exception, that guy had it coming).

We all remember the day we brought Jack Stanton home. We cleaned him up and tried to make him feel at home. Despite his complete inability to check into a hotel on his own and a curious street habit of dipping his pizza crust in mayonnaise, we knew he would be just fine at home with us.

And he was. The kids loved him. He only wet on the floor once (okay twice, but that second time was after a really long night at the bar). And it turned out, just as we suspected, the kid could write better than he could play poker.

But, I’m here to tell you folks, not every blogger rescue story has a happy ending. Today is a shining example of that. We’re all heartbroken here at PokerStars Blog headquarters after learning Stanton has abandoned his laptop (under the guise of “it needs repairs”) and made off for Madrid to…I can hardly write it…play poker.

Today, we got the first evidence and proof of life from Madrid. There he was, staring–as is his wont–into space with a starting stack in front of him. Playing poker…or at least sitting behind chips like he was going to play. He tells a story of winning a qualifier to the EPT Open in Madrid, and–despite no record of this in our files–requesting the time off to go play.

We would appreciate anyone who sees him (and we mean anyone), to do the following:

  1. Slowroll him one time and say, “The PokerStars Bloggers who are still working say hello.”
  2. Give him a list of five things (that aren’t mayonnaise) that a sane person would use as dip for his pizza crust
  3. Tell him good luck from us…I guess (sigh).

In all seriousness, we hope Jack does well at EPT Open Madrid. He’s playing today, and we hope he can cash for enough to get his laptop fixed but not so much he decides to not come back to his Pokerstars Blog home.

Good luck, Jack. And remember: they always have it.

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